Daily News and Analysis (DNA), Saturday, 16 Jan 10: pages 1 and 2 “Parents spooked by ‘S’ word” and “Board plays emotional card on kids”

Woke up this morning to a headline that seemed to hold some promise, alas, that hope was short-lived.

How is being spooked going to prevent our young ones from attempting suicide? Parents have now moved from one extreme (that of shouting at their children to study) to another – being ‘spooked’ (reluctant to ask their kids to study).

When are we going to realise that each child is unique thus incomparable? Think about it, have you ever seen two children (even twins) who are identical? NO !

So, instead of encouraging children identify and optimise ‘their’ unique talent and potential, we push them into competing with siblings or neighbours and friends’ children even before they are out of their diapers and then we say, we are spooked by the high incidence of suicide?

You reap what you sow? Ask yourself, have you done your bit to help your child identify his core talent or have you been trying to push your budding musician into finance? Feeding him with fear of the ever increasing competition, crazy ‘cut-off’ marks, ranks thereby pushing him inadvertently into the ‘rat-race’.

When the foundation is weak, how can the building stand strong and erect?

Our children need our undivided listening, quality time and our faith so that they can maximise their potential.

They need our unconditional love; have we given them that?

The State Board hates to be left behind in any jamboree and puts its foot in the mouth by playing a ‘preachy’ emotional card where parents are likened to God and students are urged to think about their loved one before taking the drastic ‘S’ step?

How may I ask, does the Board expect a student contemplating suicide of clear ‘thinking’. That precisely is the problem, right? that students are unable to think rationally hence the drastic destructive step?

This is where parents, teachers and the education system need to show some accountability? Sending ‘directives’ cannot absolve the Board? Revamping an outdated education system which focuses on percentages and not skills is perhaps a medium-term goal?

What about immediate measure?

• Counselling the school administration and teachers so that they see students for their uniqueness and not put undue pressure on performance.
• Training teachers in empathy and communication skills; after all, the ‘guru’ is only human and their behaviour and words have potential to hurt and cause significant damage to young minds.
• Training teachers and parents to identify signs that a student is finding it hard to cope so that timely intervention can avert such tragedies.
• Having a counselling process in place for parents, teachers and students.

‘Directives’ are not going to be enough anymore and its time we all take responsibility and start making a difference in our own way before the problem really takes on ‘spooky’ proportions.

by: Priyanka Chaturvedi